Objects on the Internets may be Smaller Than They Appear

Self aggrandizing dominants make me laugh, shudder, and shake my bleary head. It is the quiet, humble ones to watch out for; they are more likely to know the taste of marrow and just might teach you a thing or two.

My First Time Under Nina

I showed up at Nina’s house at four thirty, and had a smoke at the end of her driveway while I waited for her to come home from work. She was there within a few minutes. She gave me a brief smile as she pulled in. I met her at the car and received a peck on the cheek then I followed her inside. She was dressed for work at the warehouse, wearing jeans and a work shirt. She went in to use the bathroom, and I stood in the kitchen trying to act cool. I was still embarrassed about what had happened the night before. I lit up another cigarette so I would have something to do with my hands.

She came out of the bathroom, grabbed a beer from the fridge, took the cigarette out of my fingers and headed towards the basement door. I reached in to get a beer. She came back and pushed the door closed on my hand, gently, trapping it in the door. I looked up with slight irritation. Nina shook her head and took a drag off my smoke. “I will tell you when you can have a beer,” she said. “Look,” she waved the one in her hand. “You might get some of this.”

I released the can and followed her downstairs. The house was quiet. Her nice plump ass swayed as she walked down the stairs. But I had to wonder why we were not going into her bedroom. I was nervous so I didn’t say anything. She popped the beer and sat down on the couch. I exhaled and sat down next to her but about a foot away, as she was not giving me the kind of vibe that invited closeness. She took a swig of beer and looked me up and down as though sizing me up. I became even more nervous.

“So you came pretty quick last night cowboy,” she said. “I wonder if that is something you do a lot.”

I grew red and shifted uncomfortably, but I did not respond.

“You also said you would do whatever I wanted. Didn’t you?”

I nodded

“Did you mean that?”

I nodded again.

“Then say, yes I meant it.”

“Yes, I meant it Nina.”

“Good,” she said. “I like that. Now get all of your clothes off.”

“What?”

“You heard me. Strip. Take off all of your fucking clothes.”

I stood up and took off my shirt, then my boots, my pants and finally my boxers. My cock stirred the moment she said to strip. By the time I was naked I was very hard, and there was no hiding it standing there in front of her.

She signaled me to step closer and I did so. My hands were at my side, and I felt my cock jump as she gently cupped my balls in one hand and then reached her hand up to grasp them tightly at the base.

“You are to keep your hand at your side until I tell you otherwise,” she said. “Is that clear?”

“Yes Nina.”

“You have a nice big cock boy,” she said. “Seeing this nice thick meat makes me want to do all kinds of fun things, but I am afraid you are just going to come again before I want you to.”

I felt all blood surge to the head of my prick, as she gave it a quick kiss. Then, I felt her pulling me down by the balls. I immediately knelt to avoid the pain. I found myself on my knees in font of her, as she smoked, contemplating me.

“Spread your knees a bit boy,” she said. “You are nice and hard for me.” She ran her fingers along the side of my cock. “Do you like it when I call you boy? Do you like kneeling in front of me with your cock hard?”

I nodded.

“A good boy usually gets good things, and a bad boy gets ignored. Would you like to be a good boy?”

My face flushed, and I suddenly wondered if people were going to jump out of the closet, laughing at me like it was all a big joke at my expense

I nodded.

“When I ask you a question, you will answer me with the words yes Miss Nina or no Miss Nina is that understood?”

“Yes Miss Nina.”

She tilted my face up with the beer can and offered me a sip, as she tilted it up to my lips. I swallowed once, twice, mesmerized by the way she stared into my eyes, surging with lust, as she kept steadily tugging on my cock. It was not hard enough to make me come, but the constant pressure let me know she was in control.

“Now lets try this again,” she said. “I want to make sure you are not going to come again until I say. No more early jizz. No orgasm unless I say so. You will jerk off for me right now.”

I feigned surprise, as if this wasn’t the reason I had done my best to meet her and put myself in this situation.

“Go on boy. Jerk off for me nice and slow.”

I reached up and began to stroke my cock, she leaned back on the couch to watch me.

The reality of a woman commanding and supervising my masturbation got me so hot it felt as though all of my blood rushed down into my dick. I closed my eyes, and began to stroke harder and saw stars, the right side of my face burned hot where her hand had struck. She smacked me again. She was suddenly inches away from my face, gripping my neck.

“Don’t close your fucking eyes again do you understand me?”

I had never been smacked by a woman like that before and certainly not while jerking off, but the effect was pure arousal, and despite the look on her face I half fell into her wanting to be closer. She sensed it, pulling me into her warmth.

“I’m sorry,” I almost stammered. “I am not used to this I can’t come …or jerk off looking at you like that.”

She crushed her newly lit smoke and pushed me onto my back on the floor. Then, she was on top of me, and I was pinned as one leg stayed bent, she slid up my body pinning my arms. Her mouth was large, and hungry. She seemed to inhale my stiffness to consume and transmute it into supplication, sucking my tongue and biting my face while I continued to fondle myself.

She turned my head and began to whisper into my ear: “You poor poor little bitch. I can see what you will do and what you won’t do. I can see it all. I just wonder how long it will take me to train you to be the submissive boy you were born to be.” She rolled off me and kept her mouth close to my ear as she stroked my cock. “You better not come yet boy. No. No. No. I will be nice today as you are still learning, but I will not forgive what happened last night if it happens today.” Her hand on my cock felt so good. I had to fight the urge to approach the edge by biting my lip. “No, I know what you want,” she said. “Always having to be so tough and all that macho bullshit when you really want to be down under a real woman don’t you?”

“Yes Miss Nina.”

“Oohhh you remembered! Such a good boy. Now you can come like a good boy but keep your fucking eyes open and on me.”

I tilted my head to keep my eyes on hers. She leaned on an elbow and watched me. Her eyes ran up and down my entire body.

It did not take me long then. The moment she locked her eyes on mine again, I came hard with a moan. I arched, as the cum spurted up my belly and onto my chest.

“Good boy,” she said.

She tasted the cum with approval, and stroked my head then scooped the rest of it up on her finger and placed it against my lips.

I gave her a shocked look.

“Open up boy,” she said. “You were fine with me eating it weren’t you? Now swallow your load so we can move on.”

I ate the cum and then a few more scraps off her finger until it was all gone.
She pulled me up into a seated position and stood up then picked up my pile of clothes and told me to sit tight.

I sat there on the floor of the basement and thinking about her hand on my neck and her lips near my ear immediately got me hard again, and I was impatient for her to return.

Nina came back down drinking a beer and pulled me to her on the couch. Looking in my eyes, she took the head of my cock between thumb and forefinger and began to squeeze, increasing the pressure as I began to moan. She pulled the tender skin of the frenum between her fingers and pulled my dick upward hard. The pain shot as a sweet rush through my brain as she continued to kiss me aggressively, The pain increased, and I put my hand briefly on her hair to try to pull her closer. She smacked me hard across the face open hand and then again with the back. I sat back on my heels biting my lip with both shock, embarrassment and arousal.

“You keep your hands at your side, behind your back, or on top of your head. You keep them where I tell you to keep them, but you do not touch me without permission. Is that understood?”

“Yes Miss Nina.”

She stood up, kicked off her tennis shoes then pulled off her jeans and panties. She stood there a moment naked from the waist down, letting me take in sight and smell of her. She was a thick girl with big strong legs and had a thick patch of hair above her swollen wet cunt. She had worked all day in those clothes. She smelled of sweat and musk.

She walked over and turned on the old television that occupied the corner and was quickly irritated when she could not get it to work. I offered to help and was told to shut up and keep myself hard, which was not going to be a problem.

After some time, she got a show in she wanted and lay down on the couch sideways. I was instructed to get behind her and kiss her neck. I lay behind her, wrapping my arms around her body. I wanted to fuck her so badly right there. I was praying she would just slide her hips back a few inches to allow me to enter the wet heat I could feel radiating against my crotch.

“Now can you eat my pussy properly boy?”

“Yes Miss Nina.”

“Do you want to taste me?”

“Yes Miss Nina.”

“Then beg nicely. I know you will probably need lessons at another time, but right now let’s hear you try and beg.”

“Please can I eat your Pussy?”

“Jesus, you have to be fucking kidding me.”

“I’m new at this," I laughed.

She turned around with a smile and held my cock gently.

“I know you are sweetie, and I am going teach you to be a good boy. Now crawl down there and let’s see if that mouth has any talent.”

She lay on her back and spread out, allowing me access to her dripping cunt. I was young, but I knew how to eat pussy. I cupped my mouth over her big clit, and slid my tongue deep inside her. Soon she was squirming and riding my tongue, she raked her short nails behind my neck and kept pulling on the back of my skull, shoving my face into her juice and heat, as she moaned then came with a gush.

“Keep licking gently,” she said.

I did as I was told and luxuriated in burying my face in her sex. She tasted and smelled so good it was hard for me to not start licking harder again. She pulled me up with a smile, and licked the cunt juice off my face then as she reached down between my legs. I saw her expression go flat.

“I told you to keep your cock hard, boy,” she said, as she grabbed my dick, which was semi hard but certainly not ready for action. She sat up, squeezing both dick and balls with one hand, as I moaned into what almost became a scream. It fucking hurt. Bad. She smacked me repeatedly and then harder when I tried to shield my face.

Then she was up off the couch, and I sat up trying to collect myself. She stood over me and gave me another smack.

“Simple instructions asshole,” she said. “Keep your cock hard. I was going to give you a nice treat right there on the couch. I wanted to fuck that fat cock of yours and give you a nice ride, but now I’m pissed.”

“Fuck! I’m sorry," I said. "This shit is new to me.”

“You said that a few minutes ago, and I let it slide. I guess it's time for you to get some things straight huh?”

I received another smack and had a hard time not blocking it and decking her.

“I…fuck! Why you gotta keep hitting me?”

She stopped midair with a laugh. Then was she next to me, kissing me with one hand on my cock and another on my throat. Nina was iron one minute and silk the next. She whispered in my ear, so close I could feel her lips and breath: “ I keep hitting you because you fucking like it when I smack you, because your cock gets nice and hard every time I take control. Did you notice that bitch? And your getting hard for me, for my direction, makes me fucking wet, and then I just want to beat you more. You know you like it. You know you want to be my little fuck bitch, but you just haven’t figured out what that means yet.”

I was floating. I was high. I knew every word she said was true. Each breath I took smelled like cunt as my face was soaked, and her hand possessively on my cock and balls had me moaning. I groaned and slid to the floor burying my face between her legs where I could smell her. She patted my head, leaned down, and said she had to get something.

I sat on the floor and looked up when I felt her come near. She stood there. smiling sweetly, with a wooden hairbrush in her hand. She smacked it against her open palm and nodded towards the couch.

You can either take this bent over the arm of the couch, over the back of the couch or on your back she said. Usually I would put you over my knee but I cant be bothered with getting rope, and I think you will flop around a bit.

“Fuck Nina…”

“Miss Nina," she said reaching down to smack me lightly.

“Miss Nina,” I bit out. I was getting angrier by the moment. This was the tipping point between us. I was turned on but conflicted, and when I looked up at her was fire and acid in my eyes.

“Oh fuck this,” she said, storming upstairs.

I was angry and unsure. I wanted to be under her with her in control, but every time she started smacking my face I could feel my temper rise. I wanted this, deep down, but the stakes seemed to pile up higher by the second.

She came back downstairs with a tangled mess of gear and threw it on the couch. Then she knelt down next to me and took my face in her hands and kissed my forehead, cheeks, and lips.

“I like you boy,” she said. “I want to take you and make you mine, but we are going to need to see if this is what you really need a little faster than I had intended. I kissed her and she let me for a moment before pushing me away with a smile. She took a length of rope off the couch and led me over to one of two bare metal posts, common in northern basements that helped to support the weight of the first floor.

I stood up and placed my hands on either side of the pole as I was instructed. She knew how to tie knots, and a few minutes later my wrists were secure on either side if the pole. The rope was fast around both wrists and only bit into the flesh when I tugged.

She came around to stand behind me, pushing my hard cock against the cold steel. She murmured into my ear: "are you sure you can’t get free?"

I tugged and jerked hard, hurting my wrists a little.

"No, I want to see if you really can't get free," she chuckled. "Come on boy try to get free."

I pulled with all my strength and was rewarded with more pain.

“Mmm nice, well I have approximately two hours with you sweetie so lets see what you are made of.”

Her knee came up fast between my legs slamming into my nuts, I thought I was going to puke, but simply ended up on my knees gasping against the pole. “Fucking bitch,” I gasped.

“You have no idea,” she said.

She lit up a cigarette, blowing a cloud of smoke down over my head and then offered me a drag. I turned my head away with a curse. A moment later, I felt the sting of the lash across my ass and leg. She was using a long leather belt as a whip. She beat me hard and fast and did not let up for some time. I danced and howled around the pole as she laid into me with the belt. There was no tempo, no technique, and she had no formal agenda besides whipping me so that it hurt. A lot.

I cursed jumped and howled. She did not stop. Then after a while, I noticed that I felt as though I was floating, she slowed a bit, and I gave myself up to the rhythm of the lash, which seemed to be lighter and have a tempo to it. I slid down the pole to kneel on the floor then found myself pushing my ass up to meet the stokes despite myself. My head grew light. The more I pushed up to take it the more she slowed and let the strokes fall gently, allowing the strap to smack and slide across the bruised, broken, and stinging flesh.

She stopped. I kept my head low, as I felt her come behind me. She pulled my hips up and then embraced me, as I gasped for breath with my face in the floor. Her body was coated with sweat from the exertion of beating me, and I could feel her sex, wet and hot, where her crotch pressed into my leg.

“Your cock is so hard for me boy, so I know you fucking want me. You danced quite a while but I think we both know who is calling the shots don’t we?”

I nodded and sobbed into the carpet as she tugged on my balls and whispered into my ear that I was a good boy.

She got up then untied my hands and left me there as she went to go get another beer. She came back downstairs and turned me over with her foot. I was dizzy, weak, and would wear bruises on my body for the next month.

She asked if I wanted a sip, and I nodded. She took a mouthful and covered my mouth with hers, spitting the cool beer down my throat, which I took gratefully. This was repeated, and we split the beer with me always receiving the liquid directly from her mouth.

“You got me all hot again bitch,” she said.

Then she got up on her knees and lowered herself onto my face. I sucked and worshiped her pussy burying my face into her cunt, as she bore down and rode me. She came once and then again drenching my face, as I moaned into her sex, gently sucking and lapping up as much of the juice as I could.

She spun around, lowering her ass onto my face and wiggling it inches from my mouth.

“Lick my asshole, boy.”

I arched my burning back, and buried my face as far between her cheeks as I could. I had never eaten ass before but the rush was intense. I felt her working my cock as she rode my face and squirmed. I crammed my tongue as far as it would go up her puckered hole. The musk of her ass and her pussy sent my brain reeling, and I felt her slide the belt, slick with sweat and blood, behind my neck. Soon she used it to pull my face in tight and I could feel her hot juices running out of her cunt and splattering my chest. My raw back, bottom, and legs burned on the carpet as I sucked and licked her ass.

“ That's good. Eat my fucking ass, slut.”

It felt so good to be under her like that, freshly beaten, high and sucking on her while she reveled in the power. She kept up a torrent of words, some abusive and others kind, as my jaw ached from licking her hole. I was to come to find Nina enjoyed this kind of service for hours on end, and this was a light session.


She spun again to take my hand in her face, bit my lip and laughed, “It looks like I have a new toy now hmmm?”

I exhaled and collapsed under her gentle kisses, feeling my my mind enter a space where I was free, relaxed, and euphoric.

“Yes Miss Nina,” I said. “You have me.”

What I Would Like to Look Forward to

I bow my head at work and think about what I would like to look forward to as the weekend approaches: returning home early to make sure all is as she wants it to be; preparing myself to greet her; falling into her embrace knowing she is hungry; aching on my side, cramping, as she chuckles and cleans me properly; begging nicely, as I sweat and yearn to service her; licking, sucking, and moaning into her sweet scent, as she uses my eager mouth; forcing myself to endure positions; feeling drained, as I am milked before the first blow falls; muscles sore yet floating as I am secure; squirming, moaning, and then screaming as the strap falls; slipping into sleep under her sex, or ass, as she watches her favorite programs or reads; being wakened with a slap or gentle entry; looking deep into her eyes, as she fills me up, takes me, inhales my breath, and tells me she hopes I am not flagging on her : "We have long weekend ahead of us boy," she says and starts again.

What Could Have Been a Beautiful Thing

I was around fifteen years old when I was introduced to Nina. I was fairly new in town and had befriended two of the locals who were into punk and hardcore music. They were still kind of geeky but nice guys. Nice enough to introduce me to friendly people and show me around. Meeting Nina would be something that would make an impression upon me as an adolescent, and the wasted potential for a special relationship still haunts me as an adult.

Before my new friends went out for the night, they invited me down to the beach for a few beers. It was here that I first heard about Nina’s strange appetites. I heard about how she had wanted her last boyfriend to masturbate in front of her. It seems as though that was not a big deal, but then she had also become quite demanding about things. Nina had gone so far as to suggest he lie on the bathroom floor and jerk off if he wanted to be allowed to touch her. He was required to jump through various hoops if he wanted to penetrate her. The boyfriend was disgusted, dumped her, and gave out all the details after he left. Now Nina had a reputation for wanting disturbing things from her boys. I never said a word. In fact, I laughed with the rest of them as I heard the story, but something clicked in my head, and I was immediately determined to meet her.

We ended up in Nina's kitchen a few hours later to drink beer and socialize. Nina was a short, heavyset, eighteen-year-old, hippy with short, dark hair. She dressed slightly butch and was very reserved. Her sister had just dumped a boyfriend and was considered to be much more attractive by my new friends. They were all vying for the younger sister’s attention: laughing at her jokes, complimenting her, etc. Meanwhile, I hung back and watched Nina at the head of the table, as she sat quietly smoking cigarettes and drinking beer. I never said a word to her. I just stood there drinking and kept to myself.

After a while, I had to piss and went into the bathroom. I stood there looking at the cracked tile floor. I imagined myself lying on the floor under her struggling to masturbate. Immediately I started to get hard, and ended up having to force the stream down so that I didn’t urinate all over the back of the toilet.

Eventually, we gravitated into Nina’s bedroom. She had a water bed and a TV in there, making it very comfy. We spread out to achieve individual agendas in the darkness. The fellahs were on the floor, sharing a bong and hitting on Nina's sister while I managed to end up next to Nina on the bed. We ended up close together. I was hugging her, and she was keeping me at a comfortable distance, humoring me while clearly giving me the “no thanks” vibe. I suddenly felt unable to control myself anymore. I leaned in close and whispered in her ear, “I know what you want, and I would like to be with you. I will do whatever you say.” Now I am not a smooth talker or a ladies man, and I certainly was more clumsy at that age. I have almost always been the kind of guy that needs the woman to make the first move. But I wanted her to use me badly, and pure desire caused those words to tumble out of my mouth in a way that probably sounded more choked than silky.

She looked at me intently for a moment then said: “Let’s go downstairs.”

I followed her out of the room and down a long flight of stairs into the basement. There was a dingy couch on a shag rug that was parked in front of a black and white television. We sat on the couch for a moment and then were making out in the awkward, abrupt manner of youth. She pushed me back, and I remember distinctly that her kiss was very wide and aggressive. It was as though she wanted to inhale my lips and tongue inside her mouth. She was a strong girl with a large appetite. I reached down between her legs to find she was very wet, so wet that her sex had soaked through her panties and into the fabric of her shorts. She pushed my hand away and unbuttoned my pants. Then she pushed me sideways, sliding down my boxers. I kept my hands out of the way, as she slid her fingers around the base of my balls, grasping them hard.

We lay like that on the couch for some time, in the flickering light of the television. She kissed me, her eyes wide open watching me, squeezing my balls. When I would reach for her pussy, I would have my hand pushed away. “Not yet,” she would murmur. “You will take care of me soon.” I was already hot before we came down to this couch, and limited experience was to be my downfall that evening. She would dip down to suck my cock for a few minutes, taking me full down her throat and then come back up to tug harder on my balls and look into my eyes or study my face. Then suddenly I lost control and came hard. So hard my load hit her under the chin and splattered on me. I was embarrassed into speechlessness, but she simply scooped it up with a finger and swallowed it with an approving sound.

“I think you should return the favor,” she said.

I reached down and felt her silky pubic patch and very wet cunt. I licked my lips and got ready to move down her body. I wanted to bury my face in her sex so badly, and I was already hard again.

There was noise upstairs, and she pulled me back up. “Maybe we should finish this tomorrow,” she said. “I get off work at five.” I agreed. We got straightened up and smoked a cigarette in front of the grainy picture of the tiny set. I felt ashamed of coming so fast, but I did not know what to say. The whole event was weird and uncomfortable to me, as I was very young and had not yet had the later experiences that would crystallize my sexuality.

The next day, I skated over to a friend’s house that I had known in another town. He was one of the few people in that area that came from the a working class background, and listened to the same music. Back then, punk was very underground and very dangerous; It was a lifestyle not a fashion statement. I immediately felt a bad vibe, as his attitude towards me was cool and mocking. This went on for a while, and then a little bit later I finally asked him what his problem was.

“I can’t believe you would do that,” he said. “With her. You make me sick.”

I knew immediately the others had talked about my going downstairs with Nina. And from that action this guy had extrapolated a series of actions that never happened. That I wish they had happened was immaterial to my juvenile mind. This friend's attitude put on immediate notice that any kind of relationship with this girl was going to be seen as borderline homosexuality and my masculinity would be questioned. If this one person had the gall to say it there was no telling what kind of grief I would get at the next show. I do not mean teasing, or jokes. I mean the crowd I ran with would probably jump me. I had to nip it in the bud.

I wish I could say that I kicked his ass and skated away a hero. I wish I could say I met Nina that evening to finish what I had started. But he was bigger than me and ran with the same tough crowd and ultimately I wanted to keep my status in the scene. I laughed it off and made the lame excuses only a kid can make and get another kid to buy. Eventually, he, and others, made passing jokes but no one really had ammunition as nothing had been seen, and it was a just another drunken night.

I avoided Nina for a week. Finally I went over her house one evening with the guy who was now dating her sister. We met out by the pool and she came up looking nonchalant and asked why I had not shown up. I reddened then made lame excuses. She looked at me with disgust then walked away. I felt like a shitbag and was deeply ashamed. I was young, stupid, and eager to impress all of the wrong people when the right one was standing right there.

Everything I wrote above is the truth as I remember it. I will write quite a few entries here about what I wish was the truth but is merely a fantasy. Twenty three years later, I go to sleep thinking about Nina what I could have had with her. I am aware of the fact that the story above seems tame to mature eyes. You might be thinking that I am making too much of my own fantasies of what I wanted Nina to be out of a harmless hand job on the basement couch and rumors started by kids. I might agree had I not found the book in Nina’s bedroom.

I was drinking with the boys out behind Nina’s house while my friend was inside heavy petting with her preppy sister. I went inside for a beer, and found myself wandering into her room. Nina was at work, and I wanted to see the space I could have been allowed to enter. I sat on the large water bed and looked up at the barren walls. Then, I looked down and saw a red book peeking out from under a few large pillows she used to lean against on the floor while watching TV. The book was something that was hard to get at the time, a femdom photo and art collection. it was very high quality, full of black and white photos: men being whipped with belts, servicing women's cunts; sucking ass; being jerked off while bound, and forced to maintain eye contact as they orgasmed. I flipped the pages slowly, getting intensely aroused by the images, yearning and feeling a need grow deep inside me. Then I found a page that was clearly privileged over others, as it was flattened out, slightly wrinkled, and obviously looked at often.

It was a drawing of a man with an ass that was reddened with welts and stuffed up with a large plug, his face was buried in a busty woman’s dripping cunt. She held his collar tightly and smoked a cigarette. The caption read: “If you manage to make me come three times before I am done with my cigarette, I might let you eat my asshole again.”

I placed the book back under the pillow and stood up feeling dizzy and hollow. I knew there was things depicted in there that I needed and Nina needed them as well, but I was simply not ready. I walked back out on the back porch and said I had to leave. That night, I stole a bottle of whiskey and got stinking drunk alone on the railroad tracks. I had a boom box and a Social Distortion cassette. I remember I was drinking, then sobbing. Later I went to a party and got into a fistfight that should have been something minor. Instead, I broke the guys collarbone. I left town the next day on a Greyhound to stay elsewhere with a relative.

While I had many other significant sexual experiences, I will always fantasize about Nina. She was a first in a manner of speaking. She showed me what could be. I will never see her again and that is too bad. But I would like to address an apology, as well as show my respect, to all of the mature, dominant women in the world who put up with immature crap from disrespectful submissives. Sad replacement for saying it to her face but it will have to do as she is long gone.

It would take a much older and experienced woman to show me what I really was and what it meant to yearn...but that came later. I am sorry I lacked your courage and maturity Nina, because if I had had a tenth of it, I would be a much happier man having the experience of serving you.

Focus

I am a pretty focused individual. I have to be to get done what I do in a day, but that does not mean I do not wish she was here to keep me on task. I am not interested in being micromanaged. I pride myself in being able to tackle monumental tasks and come out on top when others quit. I suppose this is one of the reasons I crave submission so much. To give up control, with another having the power of punishment (corporal or otherwise) is an incredible turn on. I like the idea of finishing a busy day, lying in bed or on the floor, being allowed to service her ass or cunt, while she checks on tasks that we had agreed upon.

Right now, I am working on a huge project. I am preparing myself to get back to it, and then I will work till the early morning. But I wish I had her cool fingers around my throat, or under my chin, as she looked deep and told me to pull it together faster because she wants to play.